Saturday, October 30, 2010
The First 24 hours I Have NOT Nursed my Daughter
My daughter is now 20 months old. Many will say, "What are you doing still nursing a nearly two year old?" Some will say, "You go girl!" As she is my last of three children and the only one who took to breastfeeding easily, I'm comfortable with my decision to let the weaning process play out naturally. My original goal was to make it to her second birthday.
However, last night marked the first night in her life that I had not nursed her for an entire 24 hour period. We've given up most day-time feedings and mainly nurse going to sleep and occasionally once during the night or early in the morning. Given I was away during her regular bedtime last night, she went to sleep without me.
I'm not sure whether to mourn or celebrate this milestone. A little of both I guess. I possibly have a trip coming up in a month that would close the door for good. Do I take the first extended vacation away from my kids in 7 years or do I stay to savor a little more time of this treasure of breastfeeding? Naturally, my body is winding down and she doesn't seem bothered by it. She'll likely transition just fine.
The question is: will I? Am I ready to go cold turkey and just have hubby do her bed-time routine? Having made it 24 hours, I thought about that option. Then I pondered, "But I didn't get to say good-bye! I need some sort of proper closure!" But how exactly do I get that? This isn't just weaning a child. This is weaning my last child. The last time I'll ever savor that incredible gift we have as women to nourish and love our child simultaneously.
Maybe I shouldn't be so emotional about it, but I can't help myself. How did you know the time was right to wean? How did you say good-bye? With tears in my eyes....